Home > Fuck all y'all > I don’t really buy into Daisy Dares You

I don’t really buy into Daisy Dares You

The lowest forms of human life, as I see them:

1. People on the internet talking about “Japanese honorifics”
2. Musicians on Twitter going “look, I made a year-end list!!!!”
3. Child rapists
4. Anyone who cares about the BBC’s “Sounds of…” poll

I honestly can’t bring myself to listen to any of the artists on their 2010 longlist, but one name confused me slightly…

Daisy Dares You. According to the BBC, Daisy Dares You is 16-years-old, government named “Daisy Coburn”, makes pop punk or some shit, and is doing a debut single with Chipmunk. I know I’m certainly enthused. It sounds, as you’d expect, like a Brit School version of how Paramore would sound if they were shit and had hair like someone hoping to suck off Jonathan Woodgate at a Christmas party.

Now, hold up. She’s 16, that would mean she was born in 1993. Firstly, that means we have pop stars now who were born after Glenn Hoddle was appointed Chelsea manager. Just ponder that for a second. It also means she would have come to even the briefest familiarity with pop culture around 1998, and probably not be able to really process any full memories of TV or music until the Atta went ham on 11/9.

The point I’m wildly batting at here, is… why is a 16-year-old girl named after a character from a minor kids’ TV show that debuted in 1993, the year she was born?

There, as far as I can tell, is no other usage of the term “Daisy Dares You” other than the segment from utterly forgotten Neil Buchanan-helmed CITV spacefiller ZZZap. For those of you too young, too old, too American, or too sniffing glue in 1994 to remember it, it was a fake “comic strip” featuring lots of “wacky characters” that just made me wish that Round the Bend was still on. Daisy Dares You was a 45-year-old woman dressed as a child encouraging children to take part in “fun dares”, most of which seemed to involve them wearing swimming costumes. Insert your own “suspect.jpg” graphic here.

I just don’t understand why a musician would actively chose to title themselves after a B-list character from an E-list show that they almost certainly have no recollection of. Which means that someone at the record label has actively chosen to retitle their latest charge after said character, possibly in some sort of Murs & Slug “Tribute to…” a teenage crush. If this means that someone is gonna bring back Jenna Von Oy or the chick from Round the Twist back so I can pop legal adult boners to them, I’m all for it. But it won’t, will it? All this is going to lead to is Daisy getting dropped from her label in March 2011. As the following two demonstrate:

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  1. January 8, 2010 at 2:09 pm

    Media PR is just about the most blatant form of far-reaching propoganda as an`industry´… I suppose the name was meant to add kudos the the artist in much the same what that people hold sentimental nostaligia for thinks like thundercats, but that was an 80s product and far superior than as you put it, `an E-list show´- whoever thought this name was a good idea must have had a lobotomy at some point in their life.

  2. Tom
    November 5, 2010 at 3:28 pm

    Well, this guy got it spot on didn’t he.

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