Home > FILLER! FILLER!! FILLER!!! > Sexual assault in exchange for quattro stagioni

Sexual assault in exchange for quattro stagioni

First world problems: remember classic failed ILB series Trance Anthems, in which we dicked about with a bunch of perverts in exchange for (mild) lols? Well… one of them hasn’t been googling his username recently and emailed “Claire” out of the blue because he wants to send us, via the post, a load of pornography and, I kid you now, “a free pizza”.

Now, being SW London-based we’re in the vicinity of Firezza, so we’re feeling that offer. But, if we give him our home address, there is a 50% chance he will come round to rape us or, considering what his plans are, the Brazilian chick who lives downstairs. Morally, can we accept this pizza? ILB readership, please answer.

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  1. Samuel
    November 3, 2009 at 12:28 am

    take the pizza.

  2. Cashmore
    November 3, 2009 at 9:46 am

    How big is the pizza? Would he stretch to a garlic bread and Haagen Dazs meal deal?

    • Dom Passantino
      November 3, 2009 at 6:56 pm

      Man, you ever eaten a whole pizza, garlic bread, and a tub of HD? Plus I’m a dude that likes to fuck w/fries when he has his pizza (s’a Sicilian thing, they ain’t serving patatine fritte in North Italy). You eat all that and you feel as sick as you would if you’d been exchanging emails with an internet pervert in exchange for free food and 300 web hits.

  3. Cashmore
    November 4, 2009 at 1:27 pm

    You cane the garlic bread, you do as much of the pizza as you can, you hit the ice cream about 45 minutes later, then drink one and three quarter bottles of whatever red Somerfield has on offer and forget the whole thing ever happened. And that’s my weekend.

    • Dom Passantino
      November 4, 2009 at 1:51 pm

      (insert Dave Chappelle as Rick James going “It’s a celebration, bitches” jpg here)

  4. Cashmore
    November 4, 2009 at 2:52 pm

    And that’s how I’m livin’.

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