Home > Uncategorized > IchLugeBullets Video Hall of Fame: #1 Smut Peddlers ft RA The Rugged Man – Bottom Feeders

IchLugeBullets Video Hall of Fame: #1 Smut Peddlers ft RA The Rugged Man – Bottom Feeders

 

Remember the good old days when this blog was more than just me writing about music videos? Well, get used to it, I’ve been so aggravated by the fact we’ve lost the extra 50 hits a day we used to get from people searching for pictures of Christina Hendricks (to a dead blog called ‘Meaningful Distractions’, of all places) that I’m on boycott of anything other than pith and snark. Plus in the past week I got twitter messages from both Fat Rab from Consolevania and the dude from the Indelicates. Certainly one for the LivingSocial update feed, that.
Anyway, this is different. I actually uploaded this video myself, with my own bare hands, having had the original on my hard drive since back in the days when a Soulseek connection was the height of the P2P revolution. Of course, the reason that this wasn’t on YouTube when I searched for it is almost certainly because it’s violently obscene and really just 4:36 of hardcore pornography featuring very unattractive cracker rappers, but still. The uncensored version is here, for comparison’s sakes.
What with Asher Roth now basically being over, it’s possibly time to think about white people. White people don’t just make death metal, they sometimes rap as well, and there’s an argument to be made that all white rappers fall into three distinct groups. 
Firstly, there’s the “nice” white rapper. He’s either polite or educated, in the late 90s he was “conscious”, both before or after then he could have been distinctly middle class. So there you have your Asher Roths, your Ugly Ducklings, your dudes who travel around the world then come back and send you a demo of their album that samples some CD they bought off a Moroccan panpipe player on the streets of Al-Hoceima, and the Beastie Boys now.
Secondly, there’s the dirty white rapper. Pornocore, horrorcore, ironic ign’ant, frat rap, and so on and so forth. So here you have, as hinted at in the video, your Smut Peddlars, your RA The Rugged Man, Beastie Boys back when they were any good, and our good friends on Psychopathic Records.
Thirdly, the rapper who has another gimmick that overtakes his whiteness. This is usually nationality (House of Pain, Lordz of Brooklyn, Hilltop Hoods) or locale (200000000000000000000000000000000 shitty “rapper from out of the woods, son” MCs who existed solely between the years of 2002 and 2005 and seemingly all died with the advent of MySpace. Someone please ‘Where are they now?’ Lee Harvey for us all, we worry about him).
What this all leads me to say/think is that a) call me a fucking idiot but I honestly think that Big City Philadelphia is gonna be a legit prospect going forward into 2009 and b) “Bottom Feeders” has to be the best music video ever. I mean, the only way it could be improved is if it would be combined with the second best video ever, and you had a dying Johnny Cash snorting coke off a fat stripper’s cuntlips with Cage.
Ironically enough, there’s actually more chance of JC dropping a new hot joint than Cage these days. How a man can go from a nonsensical line like “I got a dog named Kubrick/It’s obvious I like his flicks/ Filming them with human chicks” (which is fantastic, as a) he makes sure you know he doesn’t mean baby chickens and b) really hoping this means he fucks them while riding an A-bomb) through to the cold mess of emocore bullshit he peddles now. I’d link to his latest video here, but all you need to know it was directed by Shia Le Bouef. I know, right? All I know is nowadays he won’t be ending verses with “You wanna talk shit and not get fucked up? That’s a faggot’s dream”.
The rest of it is just as wonderful. Rugged Man fucking a nun in the ass with a gun. One girl, one cup, one Mr Eon. RA jacking off in what’s meant to be the MTV Awards’ bathroom, but actually looks like a store closet. The fact that when Eon goes “E rains? Fuck it, E hurricanes” it sounds like “Fuckity hurricanes”, a much more middle-class profanity. Just everything about this video is wonderful. I know I should have put “NSFW” at the top, but if you get fired because of me, at least Twitter about it, I could do with the hits. Gotta recoup those 50 lost ones…

 

Remember the good old days when this blog was more than just me writing about music videos? Well, get used to it, I’ve been so aggravated by the fact we’ve lost the extra 50 hits a day we used to get from people searching for pictures of Christina Hendricks (to a dead blog called ‘Meaningful Distractions’, of all places) that I’m on boycott of anything other than pith and snark. Plus in the past week I got twitter messages from both Fat Rab from Consolevania and the dude from the Indelicates. Certainly one for the LivingSocial update feed, that.

Anyway, this is different. I actually uploaded this video myself, with my own bare hands, having had the original on my hard drive since back in the days when a Soulseek connection was the height of the P2P revolution. Of course, the reason that this wasn’t on YouTube when I searched for it is almost certainly because it’s violently obscene and really just 4:36 of hardcore pornography featuring very unattractive cracker rappers, but still. The censored version is here, for comparison’s sakes.

What with Asher Roth now basically being over, it’s possibly time to think about white people. White people don’t just make death metal, they sometimes rap as well, and there’s an argument to be made that all white rappers fall into three distinct groups. 

Firstly, there’s the “nice” white rapper. He’s either polite or educated, in the late 90s he was “conscious”, both before or after then he could have been distinctly middle class. So there you have your Asher Roths, your Ugly Ducklings, your dudes who travel around the world then come back and send you a demo of their album that samples some CD they bought off a Moroccan panpipe player on the streets of Al-Hoceima, and the Beastie Boys now.

Secondly, there’s the dirty white rapper. Pornocore, horrorcore, ironic ign’ant, frat rap, and so on and so forth. So here you have, as hinted at in the video, your Smut Peddlars, your RA The Rugged Man, Beastie Boys back when they were any good, and our good friends on Psychopathic Records.

Thirdly, the rapper who has another gimmick that overtakes his whiteness. This is usually nationality (House of Pain, Lordz of Brooklyn, Hilltop Hoods) or locale (200000000000000000000000000000000 shitty “rapper from out of the woods, son” MCs who existed solely between the years of 2002 and 2005 and seemingly all died with the advent of MySpace. Someone please ‘Where are they now?’ Lee Harvey for us all, we worry about him).

What this all leads me to say/think is that a) call me a fucking idiot but I honestly think that Big City Philadelphia is gonna be a legit prospect going forward into 2009 and b) “Bottom Feeders” has to be the best music video ever. I mean, the only way it could be improved is if it would be combined with the second best video ever, and you had a dying Johnny Cash snorting coke off a fat stripper’s cuntlips with Cage.

Ironically enough, there’s actually more chance of JC dropping a new hot joint than Cage these days. How a man can go from a nonsensical line like “I got a dog named Kubrick/It’s obvious I like his flicks/ Filming them with human chicks” (which is fantastic, as a) he makes sure you know he doesn’t mean baby chickens and b) really hoping this means he fucks them while riding an A-bomb) through to the cold mess of emocore bullshit he peddles now. I’d link to his latest video here, but all you need to know it was directed by Shia Le Bouef. I know, right? All I know is nowadays he won’t be ending verses with “You wanna talk shit and not get fucked up? That’s a faggot’s dream”.

The rest of it is just as wonderful. Rugged Man fucking a nun in the ass with a gun. One girl, one cup, one Mr Eon. RA jacking off in what’s meant to be the MTV Awards’ bathroom, but actually looks like a store closet. The fact that when Eon goes “E rains? Fuck it, E hurricanes” it sounds like “Fuckity hurricanes”, a much more middle-class profanity. Just everything about this video is wonderful. I know I should have put “NSFW” at the top, but if you get fired because of me, at least Twitter about it, I could do with the hits. Gotta recoup those 50 lost ones…

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  1. MF
    May 13, 2009 at 9:03 pm

    I’d argue there’s a 4th group for cracker rappers : dirty south whiggers making low-budget gang$ta rap. See : T-Bo & Mike Da Hustla and their excellent Who Dem Boyz? cd.

    Anyway, originally saw this when it came free on a disc with HHC back in ’99 or 2000 and it’s a damn shame that Mighty Mi didn’t give R.A more beats as he was a fine producer who wasted far too many great beats on Mr Eon.

  2. flycliches
    May 14, 2009 at 4:10 am

    “i used to be labelmates with shaquille oneal”!!

    holy shit this is great. i second mf’s idea of a 4th group, but would add that they don’t really have to be low budget or particularly gangster. think about paul wall, who basically sounds like any other slightly below par swishahouse mc.

  3. Cashmore
    May 14, 2009 at 9:44 am

    I once went into a toilet immediately after Cage had been in there and it STANK.

  4. Cashmore
    May 14, 2009 at 11:06 am

    Having watched this again, it makes me think: they’re very wasteful with drugs in the porno-obsessive rap community, aren’t they?

    • Dom Passantino
      May 14, 2009 at 11:11 am

      Pretty sure Cage is easily worth 10, 15 million so it’s OK for him to snort coke like it’s candy floss.

  5. Cashmore
    May 14, 2009 at 3:22 pm

    Yeah, but there are African kids starving, Dom…

    • Dom Passantino
      May 14, 2009 at 3:34 pm

      Colombian ones should be doing a bit better after this, though.

  6. Cashmore
    May 14, 2009 at 4:33 pm

    I once introduced Mighty Mi to an actual porn star and he got really bashful and didn’t know what to say.

    Check me out. I’m hella anecdotal.

  7. Cashmore
    May 20, 2009 at 8:48 am

    Listen to the cage track here

    http://www.undergroundhiphop.com/store/detail.asp?UPC=bhr1003cd

    for an indicator of what a tragedy it is that he went all serious. So sad, so sad.

  1. January 19, 2010 at 12:48 am

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