Home > Fuck all y'all > Rocklifestyle determines my death style

Rocklifestyle determines my death style

A flurry of emails at ILB “towers”:

from    Liam Thomson <******@pressredmedia.com>
to    *****@gmail.com
date    Fri, Aug 15, 2008 at 12:58 PM
subject    Freelance Writing/Music Journalism

Dear Dom,

I am recruiting a team of freelance music journalists and photographers for a brand new music website and network that is launching in a month and a half.

I liked your work and your portfolio of experience and thus would be interested to offer you a freelance position with us. We will cover any expenses initially as we are a new start-up – however there is room for promotion for paid positions and long-term opportunities for in-house staff positions as well. This would be an excellent time to get involved with us.

I hope this is of interest and I look forward to hearing back from you!

Liam Thomson
CEO & Enterprise Director
Press Red Media
w: http://www.pressredmedia.com
w: http://www.rocklifestyle.com

from    Dom Passantino <****@gmail.com>
to    Liam Thomson <*****@pressredmedia.com>
date    Fri, Aug 15, 2008 at 8:05 PM
subject    Re: Freelance Writing/Music Journalism

Who…are you?

from    Liam Thomson <*****@pressredmedia.com>
to    Dom Passantino <*****@gmail.com>
date    Sat, Aug 16, 2008 at 10:14 AM
subject    Re: Freelance Writing/Music Journalism

Dear Dom,

Judging by your blunt response you were unable to read a clearly explained e-mail with ‘who i am’ included in full in the signature.

Therefore, this offer is now unavailable to you. A little politeness would have gone a long way, regardless of confusion.

Take it easy

Liam Thomson

Well, that’s me told then.

Look, this is, in a great change for topics of discussion on ILB, part of a greater malaise. This is where the move away from print press to “online brands” has left us: we don’t have editors any more.

Back in the day, the editor was the alpha and omega of journalism. They chose what went in, where it went, who wrote it, and how it looked. Nowadays, editors of music publications (both online and dead tree) are expected to be new media evangelists, branding marketers, SEO genii, 360 degree scripters, and all other manner of inutterable bullshit that has absolutely no place in at least journalism, and ideally the fucking planet.

What does this mean? Well, the classic role of the editor was to wean bullish new media (rather than “new media) talent by telling them to stop what they’re doing because it’s dreadful, and instead try this. Nowadays, an editor is a lot more concerned with how many comments the online version of the article is going to get to worry about basic concepts like “non-shitty writing” and “does this article have any point whatsover” (which, one would assume, explains this).

So yeah, another eulogy for music criticism. But hey, don’t look so down. Let us all get around the campfire and enjoy Liam Thomson’s greatest hits!

Firstly, this is some logo. I wouldn’t really expect to find it on a new media website, it looks like it should be on a bottle of energy drink you buy at the Turkish supermarket down the road.

Anyway, what are Big L’s interests? Glad you asked:

Traveling, Singing, Creativity, Writing, Entrepreneurship, “Dot Com” development, Advertising, Reading, Frisbee, Riding, PR and Promotion, Music, Films, Socializing, Partying, Romancing, Beaches, Food, Art, Lifestyle, Publishing, Photography, Clothes and Fashion, Magazine Design & Layout.

He clearly forgot to include “using Americanised spellings despite living in fucking Bournemouth”. I’ll leave it to you to pick your favourite of those interests (maybe could be the first ILB poll?), but I’d guess it’d come down to a choice between “creativity”, “frisbee”, and my pick, “romancing”.

So much greatness on his blog, though. The fact he’s bigging up forgotten mid-90s rapcorers Zebrahead as a favourite band. Blog posts entitled “A positive forward motion” (insert your own poop gag) and “Sometimes backwards equals forwards“. Tommo’s engaging in some “corporate leisure”: he’s bought a surfboard. The advertising campaign looks like the box art for art nouveau gonzo porn. Did I mention he lists “romancing” as a hobby?

Ah, I digress. We were all on some bullshit back when we were at uni, and at least the dude isn’t (as far as I can tell) wandering around his uni newspaper music meetings with a copy of Plan B in his hand, gesturing at every else in the room going “Oh, you’ve never heard of Herman Dune? I can’t imagine you have, they’ve not been in the (sneer) NME”. At the end of it all, however, he is still on some bullshit, like the rest of the online music crit scene. Take it easy.

  1. August 16, 2008 at 6:20 pm

    Holy shit, what a fucking ass clown.
    Those ads are golden:
    “Get infected!”

  2. KB
    August 18, 2008 at 1:48 pm

    CEO and Enterprise director? Good god. Well done to people for having the goulash to set up new websites, but unless you’re a bloody enormous organisation there’s no need to spend all your freelance budget conceiving ridiculous job titles.

    Am frankly amazed that, having claimed to read your writing, he was surprised to receive an email in that vain from you, especially considering he didn’t bother to explain what the website was or why anyone should give a toss about its coming into existence.

  3. JJ
    August 19, 2008 at 12:15 am

    Don’t you feel that you over reacted slightly? As a journalist I’d be pleased to get an offer of work, regardless of the ‘new media’ style or otherwise. I’m not saying that we should all sell out to a consumer driven writing culture, but to get our words out is a plus, regardless of where we happen to have them.

    Oh, and on a side note, ‘Taking photos of people on public transport without their prior knowledge’ just isn’t as creepy as looking up that dude’s myspace to leech his personal habits.

  4. JRL
    April 3, 2009 at 4:06 pm

    “He clearly forgot to include “using Americanised spellings despite living in fucking Bournemouth”.”

    “on some bullshit”

    “fuck all y’all”

    so how are things in brownsville, dom?

    im not going to plough through your past reviews to quote the similar stuff I know is there because, as I guess you would put it, that’s not how I roll. Feel me?

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