Scorzayzee – Casio Sweep

 

If you wanted to, you could probably break out a game of armchair pop culture psychology over “Casio Sweep” and wonder why, in the spirit of tunes like this, 50 Pence’s 2003 daytime radio cracker “In Da Pub”, and myriad other UK hiphop airtime fillers, British rappers seem to be so keen on the concept of taking the instrumental from a recent hit about ballin’ and then kicking verses about how broke-ass/gutter they are. You could think about whether this is endemic of an inferiority complex, and if so if that’s an inferiority complex UKHH has to American rap, or just a complex the UK has to America full stop. Alternately, you could consider it a deliberate marker of undergroundness: I refuse to go commercial to blow up like you did on this beat, and as a result I’m still checking the dented tins at the end of the Sainsbury’s aisle.

The triumphant return of Wiley the Keyboard Warrior

Could someone get Wiley a World of Warcraft subscription or membership to a furry porn website that publishes all its users personal log-in details? Anything that ensures he spends his time on the internet doing something less embarassing than broadcasting his thoughts on message boards. 

We’ve been here before. The man who Grimey Simey Reynolds once called, seemingly without any sense of irony, “the UK’s equivalent of Rakim, Chuck D, Ice Cube, Nas” seemingly doesn’t click “preview post” to see what utter inane self-clowning shit he’s posting before the submit button is pressed. Anyway, word to Consolevania we here at ILB have been “checkin’ the forums” with regards to the Rolex advocate to see what he’s been saying this week.

Wiley: keyboard warrior

Internet message boards are solely for bored office workers. People who had a #2 single just four months ago really shouldn’t be touching them. They should especially stay clear if, despite ostensibly being male, they started bleeding heavily from the crotch the moment they sent fingers to keyboard.