Theophilus P London update

We’re nearly a month on from the original ILB/Theo LDN contretemps. We’ve laid our position out there. We even fired a few shots over Twitter, as apparently real motherfukkin’ g’s do in 2K10. And how as Theo responded? By hanging out with Jack Penate. It’s shit like this that makes me wonder why I ever bothered with rap music in the first place, if I’d have known the culture was going to culminate with its participants knocking back Hoegaarden with the less-manly version of Kate Nash (also the first artist to come out in favour of David Cameron in an NME article, Carmody fans).

Post-Midnight YouTube Filler: Roxy Music – More Than This

VitzTheLocutor 3 days ago

I don’t believe in records. I believe in small little music boxes with data files on them.

That was what Sci Fi writers imagined when I was young and it came true. So the “future” is not all trash. And I also believe that if you look into Paul McCartney’s huge production you will find one or more songs that you like as much as this unforgettable gem.

Benoit balls

Every now and then, people will ask me to justify, as an adult man with a job and perfunctory social skills, my love of professional wrestling. This video is probably the perfect encapsulation of why I still bother with it aged 27. Let me break it down for you.

Mia Culpa

ILB, and its associates, will never tire of clowning on Simon Reynolds, but in fairness the man is right a lot more frequently than he’s wrong. I think his real problem is that he’s never been fully comfortable with the 1500 to 4000 word long article, so he tends to throw in a lot of obvious padding, needless diversions and poorly conceived “hey, here’s a thought” moments, which then get turned into the main thrust of his article by sub-editors. Case in point: his famous “don’t let the brown skin throw you off” comment about MIA seems like what you’d expect from a private-school educated Oxford graduate, a culturally awkward “they bring a lot of colour to this tournament, but they’re so naive defensively” moment.

Million Dead – Smiling at Strangers On Trains/ Frank Turner – The Road

 

“When you grow up, your heart…. dies”

“Who cares?”

“I do”

Millionaires – Stay the Night

18872977 I don’t really have anything against the girls, but I definitely don’t like their music. The video was too cheesy, but at least they had fun with it, I guess. I miss how Dani used to look. She used to be gorgeous, but she’s going downhill. And she looked like she had a hugeee forehead in this video, which I’ve never seen in any of her other videos or photos. Again- Shitty music, but at least they’re having fun..

Beef: it’s what would be for dinner if you didn’t need to stay trim to fit into those size 26 Uniqlo jeans

I try to be polite. I try to be nice. I try to be positive. I try and write about music I care about. This year, I’ve tried to tell you about how awesome the albums by The Indelicates, Los Campesinos! and Army of the Pharaohs are. I’ve tried to go over classic joints and rhapsodise over “The Night” by Frankie Valli, “Shame On You” by Spade Cooley and “Dove” by Moony. But like my man Silvio Dante doing Michael Corleone, just when I thought I was out… they pull me back in. I, this blog, and you the fine readers of it…. have been dissed on mixtape. I know, right?

Schteve McClaren vs Youtube Auto Transcribe

I’ve been waiting for an excuse to do a post like this for time, and in the absence of any desire to provide proper content for this place, fuck it, let’s go with it. Those of you who can drag your browser away from streaming Lisa Ann popshots on YouPorn for long enough to click around on Youtube are possibly familiar with YTs “Auto Transcribe” feature, which provides subtitles for all Youtube videos with the accuracy of the transcription feature you had on the Hewlett Packard microphone you bought back in 1998. Originally, we wanted to use this on a rap video, but the only one that provided that many lols was the one of Guru’s nephew tearfully explaining his uncle’s dying state, and we kinda felt bad about zinging there. So here, instead, are some screengrabs from a video of everyone’s favourite victorious ersatz Dutchman, Steve McClaren, spitting some interview fire in ya face.