Over Christmas, ILB made its triumphant return to its ancestral home of Northampton, better known to you all as the birthplace of the brunette one from the “Call On Me” video. What I discovered over four days’ respite was that a) Northamptonians still are, in my absence, the ugliest people in Britain and b) we’re finally getting a Nando’s, on the site of the former HSBC bank. On the latter note, I finally understand the feelings that were going through Michelle Obama’s head when she said “For the first time in my life, I’m proud of my country.” (more…)
Sorry mate. My brother used to try to sing it when it was out (he was a toddler), he died in 2003. Nothing so evocative as throwaway pop songs eh! (more…)
One of the most commonly asked questions amongst me and fellow failed music hacks who keep a piece of shit blog with 200 readers a day is: why The Guardian? Why are you wasting the bandwith of WordPress, Blogspot and the hosting company of the message board you spend five hours a day on by pissing and moaning about Rosie Swash/Tony Naylor/that one racist broad who edits Rwd? (more…)
The second in a series of two posts over this pre-Christmas weekend paying tribute to two aspects of ILB culture that passed away in the previous seven days.
Officially, he’s termed himself “moving onto other things”. Technically, he hadn’t rhymed on a track (as himself, at least) since early 2007. In reality, he’ll probably still turn up to drop a few beats, a few mixtape spots, a podcast or whatever every now and then. But still, J-Zone’s further retirement from rap music is has made me pull the colon/open bracket face in real life. (more…)
The first in a series of two posts over this pre-Christmas weekend paying tribute to two aspects of ILB culture that passed away in the previous seven days.
Only a fool would deny that Christina Hendricks represents the American Dream distilled. Two-and-a-half years ago she was third fiddle in some piece of shit sci-fi show that nobody could ever possibly cared about, and was forced to attend conventions where she hung out with crazy characters like this: (more…)
Content has been a little low on this site recently on account of the large amount of mucus that’s currently pouring out of four different orificices on my face. However, even battling with what, due to my state of illness, I can only assume to be viral meningitis, I can still find time to get massively annoyed by Estelle. (more…)
As we’ve gone over previously, no year-end lists at IchLugeBullets.com. That’s a promise. However, just to give you a little insight into what would have been there, it’s perhaps worth knowing that both me and professional Rocktimist blogger-lookalike Simon Reynolds share just one track in our top ten of the year: Blackout Crew’s “Put A Donk On It”. (more…)
Remember the rape porn mixtape post from a few weeks back? I checked back a few days ago to see if anything else had happened since to save that from being the miserable washout it was, but there were two solitary new posts: one suggesting the soundtrack to The Jackal, and the other suggesting “Beat It”. By Michael Jackson. Good work all round. So we decided to visit forums belonging to the spiritual brothers of the rapists: the pick-up artists. Here are a few of the best posts on pop music we could find from this wacky collection of failures and guys wearing big massive hats in the belief it’ll get them laid. And if anyone thinks I’m being too harsh on PUAs, here is a thread where they discuss what lessons for the PUA community can be learned from Josef Fritzl. (more…)
Far be it from me to blow my own horn too heavily, but occasionally I do come across something I wrote a year or so ago that reminds me that when it comes to music crit, I’m the only big money game in town. So here’s the first in an occasional series here at ILB where we just copy and paste a review I wrote elsewhere 12 months ago because, to be frank, you almost certainly didn’t bother reading the site it was on in the first place. Because you had they’d have enough money to (zing deleted on legal grounds).
